You call these celebrities?

Via LGF (link right) the full text of the celeb letter of support to Saddam is here.

The cumulative number of months that these people haven't worked is probably well into the 4 figures, as they say in Hollywood. And, how did these has-beens find out about the letter? Is there a celebrity mailing list? Did they put up a poster at the unemployment office?

You might ask, who cares what some celebrities think? Well, unfortunately, celebrities do have an influence on society. So, what they think, if anything, should be somewhat paid attention to at the least to know what to watch out for.

I wonder why fellow blogger Wil Wheaton - who parenthetically looks like Phranc's brother in his blogpic - didn't sign in the Star Trek veteran section? And, why wasn't the hottest Star Trekkian ever, Roxann Biggs-Dawson, invited to sign? Enquiring minds and all that.

For your easy identification of your fav celeb, I have classified them by subspecies:


ULTRA DOABLE, PREFERABLY AFTER A BRAIN REPLACEMENT

      Janeane Garofalo


VERY DOABLE

      Melissa Gilbert


GO BACK TO YOUR JAR, ODO

      Rene Auberjonois


SLIGHTLY DOABLE

      Gillian Anderson
      Kim Basinger
      Tea Leoni


ENEMIES OF HUMANITY

      Edward Asner
      Ed Begley, Jr.
      Tim Robbins
      Susan Sarandon
      Martin Sheen
      Gloria Steinem


NEVER HEARD OF THEM, DON'T WANT TO

      Amy Aquino
      Jordan Baker
      David Bale
      Eugene J. Carroll, Jr. (Rear Adm. U.S. Navy (Ret.)
      Kathleen Chalfant
      David Clennon
      Jack Coleman
      Peter Crombie
      Dana Daurey
      Ambassador Jonathan Dean (U.S. Rep. to NATO-Warsaw Pact)
      Sean Patrick Flanery
      John Fugelsang
      Samaria Graham
      Robert Greenwald
      Paul Haggis
      Ethan Hawke
      Marg Helgenberger
      LaTanya Richardson Jackson
      Melina Kanakaredes
      Kevin Kilner
      Donald Logue
      Wendie Malick
      Mary McDonnell
      Janel Moloney
      Peter Onorati
      Alexandra Paul
      Ambassador Edward Peck (former U.S. Ambassador to Iraq)
      Seth Peterson
      Steve Robinson, Sgt., U.S. Army (Ret.) (National. Gulf War Resource Center)
      Mitch Ryan
      Tony Shalhoub
      Jack Shanahan, Vice Adm. U.S.N. (Ret.)
      Bradley Whitford


SUPERPONCES

      Jackson Browne
      Michael Stipe (REM)


OUR BOSS WAS DOING IT, WE HAD TO TOO

      Peter Buck (REM)
      Mike Mills (REM)


NAME SOUNDS FAMILIAR, TOO TIRED TO GO TO IMDB

      Theo Bikel
      Barbara Bosson
      Don Cheadle
      Peter Coyote
      Lindsay Crouse
      Suzanne Cryer
      Charles S. Dutton
      Hector Elizondo
      Cary Elwes
      Mimi Kennedy
      David Rabe
      Alan Rachins
      Esai Morales
      CCH Pounder
      William Schallert
      Blair Underwood
      James Whitmore, Jr.
      Alfre Woodard
      Noah Wyle
      Howard Zinn


JUST BACK FROM TAXVILLE, BRASIL

      Diahann Carroll


IS HE/SHE STILL ALIVE?

      Jill Clayburgh
      David Duchovny
      Olympia Dukakis
      Shelley Fabares
      Mike Farrell
      Mia Farrow
      Laurence Fishburne
      Larry Gelbart
      Danny Glover
      Elliott Gould
      Robert Guillaume
      Robert David Hall
      Ken Howard
      Helen Hunt
      Anjelica Huston
      Jane Kaczmarek
      Samuel L. Jackson
      Jessica Lange
      Camryn Manheim
      Marsha Mason
      Richard Masur
      Dave Mathews
      Kent McCord
      Bonnie Raitt
      Carl Reiner
      Susan Sullivan
      Eric Roberts
      Marcia Strassman
      Loretta Swit
      Studs Terkel
      Lily Tomlin
      James Whitmore
      Peter Yarrow


SLUMMING AGAIN?

      Matt Damon


USED TO THINK THEY WERE ONE OF THE GOOD ONES/HASN'T WORKED SINCE VOYAGER

      Vincent D'Onofrio
      Robert Duncan McNeill
      Ed O'Neill
      Chris Noth
      Armin Shimerman
      Dennis Weaver


DO THEY HAVE A SPECIAL LETTER FOR DINNER THEATER ARTISTS?

      Bonnie Franklin


THE BLOOPERS WHERE HE SWEARS AT THE STUDIO STAFF ARE REALLY FUNNY

      Casey Kasem


CELEBRITIES WHO WERE TOO PROUD TO SIGN

      Gary Coleman
      Dabney Coleman
      Danny Bonaduce
      Joe Piscopo
      a former Brady sibling
      Screech (Justin Diamond?)
      Ron "Welcome back, Kotter" Pallillo
      Manut Bol
      Refridgerator Perry


A VERY DOABLE CELEBRITY WHO SURPRISINGLY IS NOT A SIGNATORY

      Natalie Merchant