Continuing our Strange Pet of the Day series, we ask: have you sinned? I mean, a really good sin? Your penance is to live this, view it inside your mind, read it over and over until you have paid your due:

Hi, my name is Kiara. Thanks for coming to visit me! I just love having visitors! Now I know your first question is, what the heck is that?!?
Well, I am called a Kinkajou (kink-a-choo) although I am more commonly know as a "Honey bear." You see I just LOVE honey! Actually it probably has more to do with the fact that our fur is a pretty honey color. What type of animal do I remind you of? A monkey, cat and even a ferret? I've heard them all before:) Believe it or not kinkajou's are actually related to raccoons, coatis, ringtail cats and possibly even panda bears!

... At home I live in a LARGE cage. Mommy says to make sure you know how big we need our cages. Imagine a bathroom in your house, now go out and look for a cage that size... Mommy has 2 big parrot cages that she made into one big cage for me. I have lots of ropes and braches inside. There's also a couple pouches for me to sleep in and LOTS of water. I can drink A LOT!
When I get up at night I spend most of my time jumping and climbing all over the place.

Escaping from my cage is the best! I get to find all of the fruit snacks and goodies mommy has in the kitchen. When I hear her coming I just hide until she gets close the I jump out! I love to scare mommy, hehe. Then I give her a kiss and she lets me sleep with her for awhile...

...Every night I get 4 different kinds of fruit. [Fruits are enumerated...] are just some of the kinds of fruit I get.
I never eat strawberries. I really don't like them and mommy read somewhere that all kinkajous may be allergic to them! (Mommy has been recently hearing the same about avocado...)

...5-6 Zupreme monkey biscuits every night, I'm not sure what these are but mommy says they are good for me...

...Mommy says I need protein, whatever that is...

... Yogurt is SOOO good. I only get that 1-2 times a week. Good calcium mommy says...

Hup! Hup! Hup! What are you doing down here? Go back and read it again. And again. And again and all over again. Until you're absolved.