Janet Jackson's left tit has issued the following Press Release
NEVERNEVERLAND, CA -- Justin Timberlake was supposed to rip the cover off me. Not the right one, me. I was the one wearing the pastie. I was ready to go. But, no. Janet kept telling that numbnuts "Remember, Justin. Not the forkhand side. Rip off the non-Forkhand side."
Instead, he must have got confused. Call it poetic justice.
Oh, and as for that star thing? It's a freaky Jackson Family thing involving Satanism and white wine.
On behalf of myself, Janet, and my friend to my right, I would like to apologize to everyone in America and around the world. I am truly sorry for ruining America's Big Game. I apologize once again for tainting America's celebration with my classless, crass and deplorable stunt. Our nation's children and citizens deserve better.
P.S. Who the fuck would pay money to see Janet Jackson's tits?
P.P.S. See also "Janet's Bared Breast A PR Stunt?". No! A washed-up member of America's Freakiest Family perpetrating a PR stunt?