The Lonewacko Review

The West Wing
Watching a Louis "Calypso Louie" Farrakhan speech would be horrifying, but also entertaining. I recently saw my first episode of The West Wing. It was a bit like a Farrakhan speech, only not so horrifying.

President Sheen (Joshua Bartlett) wanders from room to room and situation to situation, dispensing wisdom and humility to staffers, press, and the general public like a liberal Mike Brady.

Almost all the Democrats are young, attractive, sexy, vibrant, somewhat multicultural/multiracial/multigendered, caring, and, most of all, earnest. Even the older Democrats are vibrant. America is truly in good hands with this crew. They truly do know what's best. A featured Republican is a young blonde bimbo lawyer; the rest of the few other Republicans are Old White Oppressors.

One of President Sheen's advisors screems a gun-control rant into the screen, and the Republican answer is silenced by the pen of Aaron Sorkin.

First Lady Stockard Channing is upset that President Sheen didn't mention the Violence Against Women Act in his SOTU speech.

On the Sorkin Scale, The West Wing gets 3.5 rocks.

The Apprentice
Survivor sucks. Seriously, they're graded on how can shoot arrows into plates? The Wild Rules (ESPN) was a lot better, but most of what they did consisted of orienteering. It would have been better if they'd bagged a peak or two.

The Apprentice is something I can relate to a bit better than other reality shows. For instance, the contestants competed to see who could get various items for the greatest discount off of retail. As someone who frequently tries to negotiate various things, that's something I can understand.

In another competition, they had to dream up an advertising campaign for a new airline. They got the full use of an ad agency, and the only downside was that they might get fired by Trump.

The two episodes I've seen so far don't drag on unlike other reality shows. Two problems are running out of good ideas for competitions and people getting tired of Trump.

Another problem is that most of the contestants are neither street smart nor book smart. None of them are exactly self-starters.

On the Sorkin Scale, The Apprentice gets 4 rocks.