[This is a Lonewacko special movie review of Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. I hate movies, and I hope it shows. I realize of course that I'm a bit behind the times with this, but I recently saw it on cable.]

Harry Potter is an English schoolboy who wears trademarked and copyrighted glasses. He goes to school in a school of magic. Which is quite a change from the usual English school boy drama (viz. David Copperfield). Unfortunately, Harry has enough gruel. However, conflicts come about because Harry and his pals are the good kind of Satan-worshippers, and they fight against the bad kind of Satan-worshippers. Anyway, Harry lives in this castle where he goes to school with a large group of English character actors. Some of them wear fake beards or wigs.

There is also a delightful, new character named Dobby. Unfortunately, I have been unable to yet find a Dobby doll or drinking cup; perhaps he didn't test as well as Jar Jar Binks. Dobby is a CGI character, as are many of the other fine characters in the film. I was vaguely worried that Harry would be killed (or at least given a nasty electrical shock) when being chased by various of the CGI characters.

So, after being chased by the bad guy's snake through some chamber or other, Harry survives and becomes a Big Time Magician.