Wacky Humor Archives
This is a very large file. For the full smaller digest version, click here.Quick links:
- Breasts not Bombs picture
- Carolina Panthers cheerleaders
- Thailand's Tiptantree Rujiranon and the Miss Tiffany Universe award
- Weather girl Jackie Johnson
- Simpsons DVD guide
Skateboarding dog! (the creepy version)
There will come a time when the other animals will finally get their revenge, and only PETA supporters will be spared. And, it will look like this:
Here's another keeper
The minions of a certain TV show and/or network have deleted this once before, so on behalf of myself and all other fans (presumably including this guy), please make sure this one remains available, if you know what I mean:
"52to48" (52 to 48) meets widespread acclaim, as Obama voters reach out to others with love, respect, sharing, and caring
The 'Net is abuzz with acclaim, warm hugs, and kisses for "From 52 to 48 With Love", a photo compilation of Obama and McCain fans reaching out to each other in a sign of consolation and mutual love and sharing and respect. Now, certainly some technically accurate people will point out that it should actually be 'From 21 to 19 Or Thereabouts With Love' since tens of millions of people didn't vote, but ignore those wet blankets. Instead, go see this heart-warming collection at zefrank.com/from52to48withlove. And, you can even contribute! This beautiful photo gallery has already won fans and supporters across the globe, and some were deeply moved. Like, this guy:
I guess I should have warned everyone about that, but I was so overcome by joy I forgot.
Wikipedia is a good, credible source for one thing at least
In the past, I've been extremely critical of Wikipedia and I still consider them, among other things, as a source of disinformation. In fact, if you're reading this as a single post you'll see that I have a site just about them.
However, there is one good thing I have to give them credit for. Actually, two things:
commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Image:LargeBreastCleavage.png
Sadly, the provider of this "self-made" photo doesn't have a user page or another way to send her thanks. However, I did work the picture into my new video about eCitizen's "Ask the President-Elect" contest:
What the heck just happened?
A poll about yesterday's election is in the extended entry.
Fake flier tells Democrats to vote on November 5; telepathic plagiarism?
A phony flier is being distibuted in Virginia telling Democrats to vote on November 5 (link). Oddly enough, it mirrors a satire I wrote but never got around to posting. I think mine is better, so here it is:
----------------------
Reminder: November 5 is Overflow Voting Day
I know everyone's probably sick of the TV commercials and billboards by now, but just to make sure everyone's heard about it I thought I'd mention (again!) that Wednesday, November 5, 2008 is now Overflow Voting Day, and you can vote on either the 4th or the 5th.
As everyone knows, this Overflow Voting Day was added due to expected heavy turnout due to the certain blowout by Barack Obama. Because of that blowout, it's probably not necessary for many Democrats to vote, but if you do you might find that there are shorter lines on the 5th.
Should SP go bf?
This, this, this, this, and this are great, but for a change of pace how about things like this or this?
Pranked: New York politicians jump at chance to meet cruel dictator
From this:
Islam Karimov is the autocratic leader of Uzbekistan and a man routinely described as one of the worst dictators on earth by the likes of Human Rights Watch and Amnesty International. (The group Common Dreams once suggested he's so bad that he made Saddam "look good.") Since taking over the oil and gas-rich country in 1989, he's plundered billions, held fake elections to keep himself in power, censored the media, and tortured those who dare to challenge him, often using some of the most barbarian methods to do so, like submerging them in boiling water. And now he's coming to visit New York! Not really. But we wondered: What would happen if one of the most evil tyrants did decide to come to New York. Would he receive a warm welcome from the local political establishment? We wanted to know. So we did what you'd probably do in such a situation: We printed up some official-looking letterhead and sent out letters to various City Council members and local congressmen to see if they'd take the meeting. And guess what? Lots of influential politicos have no objection to sitting down with one of the worst men on earth.
Several New York politicians - but unfortunately not Michael Bloomberg - took them up on the offer, and the office of at least one was rather eager for a meeting.
I think it would be incredibly wonderful if someone else could try something similar in Los Angeles or in California.
Endorsement: Barack Obama for President
I'm sure you're as shocked as I am that I'm coming out in support of Barack Obama. However, after reviewing this blog's postings for the past couple of years, I've come to the sudden realization that I've been on the wrong track.
Now, I am officially on the right track. I am on the track for Obama!
I deeply regret all the lies I've told about Obama. Now, I pledge to only tell the truth. Barack is truly the best man for the job, and he truly has the best interests of the U.S. at heart. Under his astute leadership, the U.S. will truly prosper and live in peace with our global neighbors. Not only will Obama help heal the wounds we've opened around the world, he'll bring new prosperity here at home. His plans for the U.S. are truly outstanding and I urge you to take note of their main areas of interest: health, education, liberty, peace, management, electrification.
I want to stress that I arrived at this endorsement after much deep thought, and I am giving it completely voluntarily. I must vote for Obama. You must vote for Obama. Our peace and security depends on it. Obama will watch over each and every one of us and already has a support network in place, in every city, neighborhood, and city block throughout the U.S. If he isn't elected president, who knows what will happen.
And, I urge all other former Obama opponents to join us. Join our movement. Bring hope, and change!
However, at the same time as Obama will give much, he will also demand that we do our best and that we help his plans. Therefore, in order to do my part to bring hope and change, I will be helping him reach out to his opponents and bringing them in to the fold. I have already provided his campaign with a list of their names. I encourage other opponents to contact the campaign with the names of those who would thwart his plans. Obama is correct. His enemies are wrong. And, yes, it's as simple as that.
Please, please vote for Obama. We have no other choice.
UPDATE: Some people are reacting in horror to this endorsement, but I urge them to remain calm. You have nothing to fear from a Barack Obama presidency. Please do not resist.
UPDATE 2: Listen to your leaders at the Los Angeles Times. Like Barack, they are only thinking of what's best for you (link).
UPDATE 3: How sad. Some people are trying to claim that I was coerced into giving this endorsement. Nothing could be further from the truth...---... I made this endorsement completely voluntarily and of my own free will.
Please, please, please...---... I urge you to join with me and help Obama with the six themes of his presidency:
* Health
* Education
* Liberty
* Peace
* Management
* Electrification
...---...Please!
Isaac P. Friehle says: Support Bill Ayers! (supportbillayers.org)
One of Bill Ayers' glassy-eyed followers has created a site called "Support Bill Ayers" (supportbillayers.org), which includes this:
The current characterizations of Professor Ayers---“unrepentant terrorist,” “lunatic leftist”---are unrecognizable to those who know or work with him. It’s true that Professor Ayers participated passionately in the civil rights and antiwar movements of the 1960s, as did hundreds of thousands of Americans.
And, that's right. Why, I distinctly remember the mandatory bomb-making classes which were mandatory "back in the day". Oh, those wild and crazy sixties! Public school teachers across the land would lead their charges in chants of "Kill the piggies!" Those were the days!
The site also has a petition you can sign. Seeing that "Alfred E. Newman" from the "University of Southern North Dakota at Hoople" had already signed, I gladly and completely voluntarily signed as well: "Isaac P. Friehle", the "Huell Howser professor of Law, Coleman State University at Gary".
We've received a note from Andrew Sullivan!
At one time, Andrew Sullivan was somewhat sane. Then, a series of things happened and, well, you know how he is today.
Over five years ago, I got a link from Sully, and thus I feel duty-bound to help. Using that linkage as an entree, I sent him an email expressing my hope that he seeks help.
I got this in return:
Todd Palin, husband of Sarah Palin, and I share common, sacred bond
Todd Palin - the husband of John McCain's vice presidential nominee Sarah Palin - and I share a common bond.
Todd (as I call him) is part native Alaskan, that is, part Eskimo.
Distant relations of mine are also part Eskimo.
Todd understands the trials and tribulations of those distant relations of mine. I don't know what those trials and tribulations are because I've only seen those relations in photographs, but I'm sure they are several.
While I am not part Eskimo, they are. And, when I look at Todd, I see them. They are me, and I am they. Todd and I share a common bond. Todd is one of us, and I am one of Todd's.
Therefore, I shall vote for McCain, and thereby vote for Sarah, and thereby vote for my brother Todd.
If you don't share that common, sacred bond that I and Todd share, maybe this will work.
UPDATE: Why does Heather MacDonald hate my brother Todd? (link)
Recreate '93
The Democratic National Convention is about as exciting as watching the 37th Plenary Soviet, and even more predictable. The MSM pretends they're doing real reporting, as do the "citizen journalists" whether of the Democratic partisan hack or low-hanging fruit variety. The only thing that would make it interesting is if there were some kind of teleprompter malfunction.
Accordingly, I invite PUMAs and all others to relive the glory days of '93 - the days before Dennis Miller became disfavored - while waiting for something - anything - to happen:
Olympics events (2008 Beijing)
Every two or four years, Americans cluster around their televisions and pretend to be interested in obscure sporting events like the pentathalon. Have you ever done a pentathalon? What exactly is it?
And, that time is again here as the 2008 Beijing Olympics kicked off over the weekend.
There are only two slightly interesting sports: archery and shooting. And, those are only interesting in the same way that their winter counterpart (the biathalon) and NASCAR are interesting: something might go wrong. With almost all the other "sports", it's hard to tell when something has gone right or wrong because only about 0.0001% of Americans have ever played them. They might as well add lacrosse for all the relevance most of the "sports" have to our daily lives.
By now you know the drill: after two weeks of soupy personal tales of the athletes' struggles, four or five stars will be selected to adorn our Cheerios boxes until such time as they've faded from public view and are forced to MC supermarket openings and such.
Here's a rundown of the events this year:
REAL TEAM SPORTS: These are Baseball, Basketball, and (perhaps) Soccer. None are, of course, Football. And, since no one knows anything about the non-U.S. teams, wagering is pointless.
FAKE TEAM SPORTS: Badminton? As for Beach Volleyball, there's only one reason for that. Ditto with its indoor cousin, albeit much less so. Field Hockey is included, and it's close enough to lacrosse to be completely irrelevant to most people. As for Softball, why?
CELEBRATIONS OF VIOLENCE: Boxing, Tae Kwon Do, and Judo. The last two are neither Greek nor American; why are they there?
ROADIE-CENTRICISM: Their idea of Cycling is roadies. While there will be some mountain biking and BMX, that won't be for another week and until that time we'll be forced to watch brightly spandex-clad roadies going around in circles.
MARK SPITZ: Diving and Swimming, who cares?
SYNCHRONIZED SWIMMING: Enough said.
BARELY WATCHABLE: The problem with Gymnastics is that by the time they turn 18 they can barely walk.
WHY NOT SHUFFLEBOARD? Handball? The name alone should rule that out. Is Table Tennis even a real sport?
WHY NOT POLO? Seriously, unless you're a Harvard alum or you live in Alaska you've probably never been in either a Canoe or a Kayak. Equestrian? Raise your hand if you own a horse. Ditto with Sailing and Rowing. As for Fencing, why not just make it interesting and go for Dueling? While some from hoi polloi play Tennis, they're trying to keep them out.
TRACK MY BOREDOM: No one knows what the Modern Pentathalon or the Triathalon consist of, and no one cares. There's also a catchall "Track and Field" event for exciting things like watching people jump over hurdles, just like horses.
DO YOU LIKE GLADIATOR MOVIES TOO? I'll put Water Polo, Weight Lifting, and Wrestling in this category for no particular reason.
Exclusive: Secret Barack Obama training video
An escapee from Camp Obama is valiantly trying to get the word out about the Obama campaign, and has sent us the following super-secret Barack Obama campaign training video.
According to our unnamed source, all Level 2 and above BHO campaign volunteers - as well as all staffers and even members of the travelling press corps - are required to watch this video. Not only that, but they have to watch it several times per day.
And, yes, it just goes on and on and on like that.
Barack Obama supporters angered, saddened by John McCain blog commenting scheme
In yet another bone-headed move, the John McCain campaign is encouraging their supporters to leave McCain talking points in commenting sections on blogs (link). If they do that they'll get points which can be redeemed for prizes, including cases of beer. The much more honorable suggestion would be to correct misinformation, but that's not what they want.
Needless to say, reaction was swift and strong from Obama supporters.
Over at The Trail, "Stewie" condemned this plan, and then launched into the suggestion that McCain wears Depends. Three seconds later, "ObamaIsTheOne2008!!!" - oddly enough, using the same IP address as "Stewie" - called those who'd leave such comments names, and then launched into a tirade calling McCain "McSame". Then, five seconds later and also using the same IP address, "BeckyIowa" revealed that she's a 50-year-old white woman who - although previously a McCain supporter - is now voting for Obama. Five seconds later, "Bob Smith" - using an IP address resolving to a web company in Mumbai - claimed:
The tide is starting to swell.The coal is getting stoked. The blinders are being removed. The chant of a few is becoming a chorus of thousands.People all over this country are learning that there is still hope for our great country.Obama 2008.
#dontgo momentum builds! Stumble friendly! Keep it going!
#dontgo (dontgo.us) is truly a "turning point for the right" (link). Others are no doubt raving about it as I write this.
However, I dare anyone who isn't part of the loop to figure out what all those words at the last link mean because I have absolutely no idea what's going on. Nor am I going to bother satirizing how insular one would have to be to expect that anyone who'd visit your site is already "part of the conversation" and thus explaining what you're doing isn't necessary.
Should there be a stiff tariff on Canadian imports?
Based on the following Youtube view counts, I believe that a stiff tariff on Canadian imports - specifically entertainment products - should be enacted. Something on the order of 250% or so. That should also apply to those like the second below who are now U.S.-Canada dual citizens. In fact, it should especially apply in that case.
CANADIAN:
89,654,849 views: link
14,037,992 views: link
9,315,843 views: link
AMERICAN:
8589 views:
All problems solved, Santa Monica moves on to ficus commemorations
Guillaume's Pick: Music Videos of the Week
My main computer's audio doesn't work due to a short of some kind. Thus, with much trepidation I turn to Team Lonewacko member Guillaume to provide us with this week's Music Videos of the Week. He assures me that the music on the following video is top-notch, even if the visuals would tend to give a different impression. He also says that if that's not good enough, this might be even better.
On the other hand, if it turns out that Guillaume is wrong, here are a few from a Hungarian folk-rock-ish band called Chalga (homepage), which not coincidentally is also the name of a musical style which is generally different: link, link, link. The first of those features the lead singer in a scarf, another "special interest" of Guillaume. All I remember about the last is that she keeps repeating something like "gar gush gergelyem" over and over. I have absolutely no idea what that means, but it obviously means something to her.
Pr000n spotted in Google News
And, not the regular kind of imaginary pr000n involving Nancy Pelosi getting busy, but the real kind. Apparently their standards aren't as strict as I've heard.
There's a screenshot in the extended entry for those with a strong enough constitution.
Accessible mouse idea developed during hike leads to learning fun Canadian facts
The World Wide Web is truly a wonderland of learning, and thus it was for me today. While out hiking I had an idea for an accessible mouse that would be easy to use for those with various disabilities.
Sadly, it looks like a team of students has already developed something that's more or less the idea I had (link). So, I guess you won't be calling me the next Bill Gates, at least because of that idea!
On the brighter side, the search that brought me to that page wasn't clogged with Wikipedia entries, but eventually after broadening the search I chanced upon that site. And, that's where I found the following graphic that contains at least three things I (and probably you) didn't know. The first, of course, is that the first trackball was invented in Canada. The second is that it was invented in 1952 instead of the late 60s or so. As for the third:
In the past I've had some fun with our neighbor to the north, something that's both politically acceptable and very easy. My overall impression is that they're basically like the U.S., just "rotated" one or two degrees. They're mostly like us, but different in minor but disconcerting ways, such as one might see in an old Twilight Zone episode. For instance, their stop signs say "Arret" too/aussi. Or, their street signs look like American street signs, but are in a weird font and with a weird color scheme. Or, all the other minor but curious differences.
But, five-pin bowling, a variant "only played in Canada" and created "in response to customers who complained that the ten-pin game was too strenuous"? And, complete with its own hand-sized rubber ball, non-standard terminology, and Associations [en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Five-pin_bowling]? Knowledge of this alone could end America's love affair with our Neighbors to the North.
Bulgarian Folk Song Singing Hungarian Choir Babes of the Week
As most readers know, I prefer my Bulgarian folk music performed raw and real, and by Bulgarians themselves, even if it involves the bagpipe (link) or a drum solo (link). Yet, in one of his rare moments of insight, Team Lonewacko member Guillaume brought up the possibility of featuring *others* singing one of their songs, even if it's not in the more traditional fashion we've all come to expect (link). Bridging the Hungary/Bulgaria divide is one of his special interests, so eventually I was sold on the idea.
Accordingly, and without further ado, I hereby present our Bulgarian Folk Song Singing Hungarian Choir Babes of the Week... none other than the Serenus choir out of Kac, Pest Megye, Hungary (site). And, I think you'll agree.
Unsigned 40+-targeting New Zealand-living former Russian Mezzo Soprano of The Week
Congratulations! Team Lonewacko has selected this week's Unsigned 40+-targeting New Zealand-living former Russian Mezzo Soprano of The Week, and it's none other than Yulia Townsend! While she could not be reached for comment she is most assuredly proud of her award:
This cannot go unnoticed
The following is, I'm going to guess, NSFW: link. No doubt there are things even worse, but that's today's pick. I only watched the first part but keep what happens after that to yourself.
Meanwhile, if you can stand their style of music, the Barrel House Mamas aren't that bad: link. Someone else isn't bad but could be do with some improvement: link.
Earth Day was two days ago and I forgot to recycle
To make it all better, I offer the following flashback to 1995's Earth Day celebration on the National Mall in DC. Wave your Recycle flag high:
Eddie Izzard eyes political career!
Who cares. Here's some pictures of Minnie Driver:
Drudge, KGW leave me disillusioned, depressed (Mt. St. Helens snowmobiler, "ghost forest")
Drudge links to this story with the headline "Man falls into Mt. St. Helens Crater on snowmobile!" Thinking someone driving or at least seated on such a conveyance had gone over the edge, I clicked through only to find out that he had actually parked it near the edge and then had gone out on a cornice - an ice overhang - which had then broken off and he tumbled down the slope. While I'm glad that he's listed in fair condition, I don't have to add that things could have been as spectacular as Drudge promised.
Meanwhile, the same page contains a link to "Beachgoers find 'ghost forest' along Oregon Coast". Sounds intriguing, I think, envisioning a previously unnoticed hidden forest found somewhere on Oregon's desolate coast. Perhaps with spider webs and buried treasure or something. As it turns out, the "forest" is just a petrified tree stumps in the beach.
Al Gore's Green Pioneers program to fight global warming!
Al Gore has announced the new "Green Pioneers" program, a children's organization that will fight global warming and work to safeguard our environment. Green Pioneers Camps will be established across the U.S., and members will pass out literature, monitor energy consumption, and the like:
It certainly sounds like a worthy program, but something bothers me about it. It's like there's something I'm not being told or something.
Why England's in trouble, and what they can do
A far-left that would put Michael Moore to shame running the country. Rampant abuse of their immigration system that has no cost benefits. One-fifth of their workers being government employees. Surveillance cameras everywhere.
How did once-proud England descend to such a state? What can they do to pull themselves out of it before it's too late?
My answer: make knowing how to do the following mandatory for every immigrant and visitor, and make every last resident or visitor perform it at least once per day.
It's over: John McCain is our new president. I'm going on a holiday.
In a way, the news that John McCain is our new president is a bit of a relief. I'm not happy about it, but on the other hand it was getting just too nerve-wracking for a moment there, and now I can go on a nice holiday.
Secret tape of Arianna Huffington
Arianna Huffington... exposed! Apparently someone snuck a secret camera into her hotel room, and you can see a shocking peek at her life here.
(Yes, I hate promoting something like this and I wish it was so mean that Huffington herself wasn't promoting it and possibly due to some sort of business arrangement. However, it all fits together since yesterday I intentionally drove behind a bus just so I could stare at Tracey Ullman's tongue.)
Like a rock sinking like a stone: Mike Gravel joins Libertarian Party
I am laughing as I type the news that novelty Democratic Party candidate Mike Gravel has now joined the Libertarian Party. No, really.
The subhead of the LP press release is "Believes Democrats are out of touch with American citizens". So, logically enough, he's joined a party that's even more out of touch.
On the one hand it's good that Gravel was in the race, and it's not exactly a good sign that he was excluded from the debates, and it's good that to a certain extent he bucked the system (aside from things like supporting global governance and not caring about illegal immigration). But, on the other hand he was more or less a joke. On the other other hand, it's too bad he wasn't dragging down the Democrats even more than he did. But, on the other other other hand, at least he'll be providing his magic to the LP henceforth.
"Stained Blue Dress Day": new national holiday; other Hillary Clinton scheduling notes
Breaking news from Brian Ross and the indefatigable ABC News Investigate Unit, who inform us that February 28th is now officially known as "Stained Blue Dress Day:
Hillary Clinton spent the night in the White House on the day her husband had oral sex with Monica Lewinsky, and may have actually been in the White House when it happened... The public schedule for Sen. Clinton on Feb. 28, 1997, the day on which Lewinsky's infamous blue dress would become stained by the president, shows the first lady spent the morning and the night in the White House.
I'm urgently perusing all 20 gigabytes of the PDF files (available here), and these are some other interesting tidbits I've found:
* December 21, 1992: "vacation in the mountains". Which mountains is not indicated.
* July 20, 1993: "Writing a note for a friend". The friend in question or what the note was about is not indicated.
* September 26, 1993: "quick trip to Little Rock". Once again, no details are provided.
Let me know if this works
Slow news day, so to pass the time I thought I'd see if I could induce spontaneous vomiting across the U.S. and the world. Let me know what happens.
If that doesn't hit the spot, try this, this, or this.
Songs of peace, freedom, and liberation... or a communist plot?
Where did the "Hippies" come from anyway? Was there an original hippie? If so, what is his name? How exactly did a social movement that still has an impact even yet today gain such influence so quickly? Bearing in mind that hippiedom occured contemporaneously with the Cold War and with us fighting a proxy war against Communism, could it have actually been a Communist plot, designed to soften us up and make our loss certain and perhaps make the spread of Communism easier?
And, was Grace Slick in actuality not simply a useful idiot for the Soviet Union, but in actuality an agent of that empire?
To those questions I have no answers.
However, the answer might in fact be in one of the suprisingly large number of high quality Jefferson Airplane videos available online. The embedded one below is my current favorite; it appears to be live as her phrasing is somewhat different from the recorded version. And, her facial expressions are quite interesting.
For extra hippie with a revolutionary aspect, see this version of Volunteers (link). Today is a good song, although the cameraman doesn't seem to realize that Marty Balin is the one singing it (link). Focus all you want on GS, I don't mind. For some extra acidity, see Eskimo Blue Day (link). Crown of Creation is also a great song (link). In High Flyin' Bird GS gets intenser (link). Here's a version of White Rabbit that Disney's lawyers have apparently missed (link). (Note: may induce seizures and/or flashbacks.) Up against the wall, hippies, and watch We Can Be Together (link). That actually makes hippies look somewhat OK.
Barack Obama supporters: why you should vote for Lim Guan Eng instead
Here are just some of the reasons why Barack Obama supporters should vote for Lim Guan Eng instead:
1. Just like Obama, Lim Guan Eng is the candidate of change.
2. The Democratic Party is truly an international party, and, just as foreign citizens have every right to vote in U.S. elections, Democrats have every right to vote in Malaysia's elections too.
3. Lim's party, the Democratic Action Party, is only one word off from the Democratic Party. Close enough!
4. The DAP might be even further left than Obama, being a member of the Socialist International (dapmalaysia.org/newenglish/int_solidarity.htm). Barack Obama is not a member of the Socialist International, as far as I know.
5. Teresa Kok Suh Sim (dapmalaysia.org/newenglish/au_l_n.htm)
6. The USDP's (U.S. Democratic Party) symbol is a tired old donkey. The DAP has a nifty, Space Age logo: a rocket (dapmalaysia.org/newenglish/au_sr.htm).
7. Unlike the donkey (or the plodding elephant), the rocket actually means something:
The blue circle stands for the unity of the multi-racial people of Malaysia. The white background stands for purity and incorruptibility. The red rocket symbolizes the Party's aspiration for a modern, dynamic and progressive society. The four rocket boosters represent the support and drive given to the Party objectives by the three major races and others
8. The rocket's as dynamic and forward-looking as the DAP. As shown here, it can be morphed into a friendly, smiling, anthropomorphic figurine. Obama has no such symbol.
For those reasons and more, I urge you to vote for Lim and not Obama.
Win a date with Scarlett Johansson (and support Oxfam America)
Scarlett Johansson is auctioning off a date with her to attend a movie premiere, and the proceeds will benefit Oxfam America. Don't even think about what that sounds similar to or the fact that the following is an AffiliateLink and just click here to bid on your fun time with Scarlet. In addition to Ms. Johanson, you can also bid on "dates" with heretofore-unknown-to-me personages Kristin Davis, Djimon Hounsou. Those who are looking for a bargain should probably bid on the "date" with the Counting Crows. (Note: most of those will not include the possibility to get "acquainted" with the celebrity in question, although I recommend a stylish aftershave, NLP lessons, and a hopeful demeanor just in case.)
Let's make a video for Barack Obama!
Here's the challenge: take the new will.i.am video in support of Barack Obama, you know, the really creepy one with the chanting and the braindead celebrities like Jessica Alba and others I have no hope of identifying telling us how Obama's going to save the environment and bring world peace just before he brings all of us a pony and a shiny new bicycle. You know, that one.
Then, replace or augment the soundtrack with Hare Krishna chanting (link, link), preferably one that's as absolutely annoying as possible, just chanting "Hare Krishna" over and over and over and over again. For extra points, mix in some sounds of other groups which are considered to be cults (just avoid that one, the you-know-what-I-mean-one, unless you want a snake in your mailbox). Maybe throw in a very light touch of marching (go easy on that, can't overdo it). Maybe reference The Comet with a brief image of black Nikes.
But, you've got to do it in a way that's tasteful. And, make sure you do it all legal like: adding a new soundtrack to the will.i.am video would probably be fair use, but taking good portions of content from one of those Hare Krishna videos would not be.
For extra credit, load the video on a laptop and play it over and over at full volume while asking for donations at your local airport.
Controversial Croatian Classical Guitar Playing Babe of the Week: Ana Vidovic
Team Lonewacko has selected Ana Vidovic as our Controversial Croatian Classical Guitar Playing Babe of the Week. And, yes, it would be even better if she would "go bf" (in the words of Team member Guillaume), but we takes what we gets:
Related:
Croatian Olympics Babe of the Day
Pochemu ona ne govorila po-Russki?
I don't know, you tell me:
I thought Lindsay Lohan was supposed to be good looking?
In the few minutes of Herbie the Lovebug (or whatever) I saw, I found the actress quite attractive and then found out through a search that she was in fact this Lindsay Lohan that I'd heard about. However, the news that LinLo (or whatever they call her) was recreating Marilyn Monroe's last photo shoot didn't exactly perk up my ears; MM was OK, just not exactly my type.
What did pique my interest was Br'er Drudge's stern warning: [*Warning: Nudity*]...
And, that warning is transferred to you via the transitive property, should you be daring enough to click here.
Don't say I didn't warn you, but not for the reason you might think: she doesn't look very good at all (aside from a couple of assets which you might notice).
Now, her, she's stunning even despite needing a few good meals.
UPDATE: The LRT ("Lonewacko Research Team") has unearthed this, this, and this.
Perky Katie Couric, ready for the slopes, gives uncomfortable, unnecessary look into her life
I refresh Perky Katie Couric's channel (youtube.com/user/KatieCouric) every few minutes, hoping to be among the first to catch a glimpse into how the magic is made. And, I (and you) are in luck, as a new oeuvre has emerged, this time featuring Katie in a ski-style sweater and even one moment wearing a fur hat (hopefully fake fur) as she prepares for yet another hard-hitting interview, this time with Michelle Obama. Nothing really interesting happens and she doesn't say anything interesting at all. However, those whose secret thrill involves Katie, video cameras, and a hotel room are in luck:
Should Katie Couric be sent into outer space?
Perky Katie Couric now has her own Youtube channel: youtube.com/user/KatieCouric
Her latest addition to the online manifestation of her presence in our lives is entitled "My Shuttle Ride". I thought for a moment that it would be about a plan to send her on a trip on the Space Shuttle, perhaps for a long stint on some sort of orbitting platform or other. Unfortunately, the "shuttle" reference was just about the New York to DC shuttle, which she had taken in order to interview Hillary Clinton. That no doubt extremely hard-edged segment will be shown tonight.
In the video she's putting on her face with her makeup assistant sitting next to her. While videos like this humanize her, the fact remains that her output isn't anything approaching real journalism. Perhaps for her next flight she might consider a different kind of assistant: one who can think up difficult questions and encourage Perky Katie to ask them.
"Pride of England" banned from USA
The Bush administration's anti-immigrant policies strike again, as Amy Winehouse's request for a visa to visit the U.S. has been denied (link).
Believe it or don't, there's an even worse photo of Winehouse here.
This horrific event follows not long on the heels of that other Pride of England, Lily Allen being denied entry.
Even more insidiously, some don't need visas, and only denaturalization would work.
The upside is that any shortages could prompt a presidential directive to clone our far superior alternatives (Chinese site, but seems to be OK).
URGENTLY IMPORTANT BREAKING NEWS UPDATE: The DHS worked night and day, and her visa has been granted. Just not in time for the Grammy Awards. Nevertheless, her people say she's grateful for them expediting her application.
THANK GOSH FOR THE MSM UPDATE: A State Department hack was quizzed about the issue in a press briefing, with a valiant albeit unnamed member of the mainstream media relentlessly cross-examining him about this travesty of justice.
Heard any good Gregorian chants lately?
As much as I hate Youtube, they do seem to be a repository for a wide variety of chorale, choir, church, and related music. Unfortunately, a quick glance shows that while some aren't that bad (link, link) some of them aren't that good. Some are really bad (link). One that is good is just a static graphic from a recording. (That's John McCain in the lower center, if you're wondering).
MADRIGALULAR EYE-CANDY UPDATE: link
I will not let Americans be as ignorant of Canada as Britons are of their own history
I find it shocking that, at least according to an AFP account of some study, 1 in 4 English think Winston Churchill was a myth and a majority think Sherlock Holmes was real (link).
In order to avoid the same thing happening here in the U.S., I'll soon begin uploading videos designed to help we Americans know more about topics such as geography and history, and, since they're our neighbors, I intend to start with a series about Canada.
I don't know how long the first series will take me, but I hope to have it finished before the Summer Thaw. While some plucky tourists are willing to brave the 20 hours of travel currently required to reach icebound cities like Toronto, many more will wait until June when the passage should only take 7 or 8 hours. In the video, I'll highlight "Canadian National Treasures" such as Avril Lavigne, Alanis Morrissette, and William Shatner, as well as political leaders such as Kim Campbell. Many regard him as Canada's best Prime Minister ever. I'll also be featuring this map of our friends in the "snowy north":
Images of Canada/Images du Canada
(counterclockwise, left to right: Canadian National Songbird Avril Lavigne, Honorary Canadian National Poet Alanis Morrissette, William Shatner, traditional Canadian peasent costume, man holding third most popular pet in Canada, and the flags of Canada and Quebec)
Danica Patrick has new, better look; GoDaddy still sucks
Highway star Danica Patrick has a new, better look although this or the former are not exactly fully compliant with my paradigmatical standpoint:
In other news, GoDaddy still sucks.
P.S. Is there a Big Game on or something?
I WENT FOR A HIKE, DID SOMETHING HAPPEN? UPDATE: Due to an unfortunate incident involving a turducken, I haven't had much interest in football for several years, but, since it would be un-American to not see any part of the Big Game I had planned to get back from a hike sometime near the beginning of the fourth quarter. Unfortunately, I had car problems which took several minutes to resolve, resulting in me getting back with just 35 seconds left. It looks like I missed one of the more exciting Big Games of the last decade or so. I'd describe what happened during the part of the Big Game that I saw, but I don't want a repeat of NFL v. Lonewacko.
I note also that Godaddy has a Danica Patrick TV ad that was supposedly rejected by Fox for being too racy here:
https://www.godaddy.com/gdshop/media/lounge.asp?isc=superbowl&ci=11206
In the ad, she's wearing a peasant dress at the library while giving a speech about the new group she's forming to fight City Hall to prevent them from razing a hospital for developmentally disabled children in the Mid-Hudson River Valley, and immediately after learning that she's inherited 10 million dollars.
Thought experiment: how was Feist protected? ("I Feel It All" video)
Canadian songstress Leslie Feist has a new music video for her Welthit "I Feel It All" (link). And, it's hard not to watch it without cringing. There are several reasons for that, but the specific one having to do with the video itself is the thought of what could have gone wrong.
The video was shot in one take, and as she ran around tapping barrels containing fireworks, all I could think of was this. So, as a retread of my much better "thought experiment" involving a 2002 Gap ad, let me present some precautions they should have taken:
1. Painstakingly paint "fireworks" into each frame of the video.
2. Dunking her in fire-retardent chemicals and hiding a fire suit under her striped shirt.
3. Include a clause in her contract stating that Canadians are well known to be resistant to fire and disclaiming all responsibility.
4. Positioning a giant fire extinguisher above the set which, at the first hint of problems, would immediately douse the entire area with fire retardant. Artist rendition of the first milliseconds after activation below.
5. Instead of using real fireworks, use miniature, self-powered, computerized laser cartridges which, acting in concert, would appear to be fireworks.
I believe the last has the most merit. The cartridges would not have to "fly", they could move along pre-positioned titanium wires that would both be strong and nearly invisible. The cartridges would move - perhaps via magnetic or electrical force - along the wires, and could even be powered by the wires themselves. The weight of the cartridges could also be used to give a fireworks style effect. Alternatively, they could be charged with a capacitor initially, and then as it lost charge the light they emit would fade as with real fireworks. I believe that Industrial Light & Magic could pull something like that off with ease.
"Ah", you're thinking: but how would Feist be protected against falling cartridges? Well, first of all, the ends of the titanium wires would contains stops. However, some might yet fly over the stops, and because of that the cartridges would be designed to be as large and light as possible so as to minimize any possible harm. In addition, Feist would wear a helmet during the filming which could be fairly easily Photoshopped out of each frame.
Occasional Cable TV Liberal Talking Head Babe of the Week: Alexandra Acker
Whenever I spot the smiling visage of Alexandra Acker of the YDA (Young Democrats of America, not to be confused with Students for a Democratic Society, Young Pioneers, or related groups) out of the corner of my eye I immediately lunge for the remote, unmute the sound, and gaze in rapt attention. I don't believe anything she says, but I do enjoy the view:
CNN Jesuit Babe of the Day: Mary Snow
CNN's political coverage for the last hour or so is eerily remiscent of ESPN coverage of some novelty sporting event, like the 2002 Caber Tossing Championship from Nampa, Idaho. One just-one-level-above-weatherman "reporter" tosses it to another, who - speaking in hushed tones as if it were the 1994 Miniature Golf Championships from Tallahassee - gives a stock speech about the stock speech from Rudy Giuliani.
Meanwhile, all the questions that those "reporters" should be asking the politicians remain competely unasked.
And, in fact, there's only one good reason to watch both CNN and Fox, and one of them has just won our Jesuit Babe of the Day. The lucky recipient is Mary Snow, graduate of NYC's Fordham University from which she earned a BS in Political Science, which she's certainly put to good use as one of Ted Turner's foot soldiers on CNN.
Related:
Croatian Olympics Babe of the Day
International incident involving Queen Elizabeth, David Icke, and me
There are several ways to respond to the Queen of England (Elizabeth II) putting her Christmas 2007 speech on Youtube. One can simply enjoy the spectacle and the majesty. Or, one can leave a cheerful comment on one of the copies of the speech that others have uploaded. Alternatively, one can launch into a disquisition about whether royalty has a place in that country.
Or, one can just go for the cheap laughs:
I don't know why its so hard to get a good video on the British Royal family. I've never been able to find a reptilian video on them that was really clear. I think thats why your getting 1 star.
Indeed.
Here's your Christmas present
Here's a Christmas music video I made several years ago; history described at the link.
Here's a keeper
Here's some raw concert footage from 1987 in Rochester, New York featuring Natalie Merchant/10,000 Maniacs performing My Sister Rose. The sound isn't that great and the video could use some post-processing, but considering the twirling I hardly noticed that:
A version of Peace Train from the same concert has better sound (link).
Matt Yglesias, Ross Douthat, and Marc Ambinder at... The Table
This video of the premiere edition of The Atlantic's entry into vlogging is just too funny for words. I was laughing so hard at the intro music plus the hosts turning to the camera that I was unable to listen to the rest (probably for the best).
IT WAS ALL JUST A DREAM UPDATE: Now, SansAClue (Yglesias) says the intro was meant to be ironic. Apparently, as in, we were expecting three privileged Northeast establishment hacks and... we got something different? Despite his explanation, I'll continue laughing at them, not with them.
Some forms of xenophobia are acceptable
Even many "liberals" would agree that some forms of xenophobia are acceptable. For instance, the Indian singer - whose name I tried and failed to find - who was playing a double guitar in a Bollywood music video while dressed as a cowboy. It's OK to be afraid of foreigners like that.
Another foreigner it's OK to be afraid of is this guy:
Maybe she has other talents
I certainly have never taken a former supermodel turned megastar singer anywhere, much less to Disneyland Paris. So, it's only jealousy when I point out that whatever Nicolas Sarkozy sees in Carla Bruni, it's probably not her voice (link). I'm also going to rip off a commenter at that link and ask, "is that Sarkozy with the candle?"
FAQ on Celebrity Politics Permanent Pass
Q. What is the "Celebrity Politics Permanent Pass"?
A. The "CPPP" is a grant given from this site that allows the celebrity recipient ("CR") of the CPPP to state virtually any political opinion without being subjected to my trademarked snarky, bile-spewing, and/or vituperative commentary. While I reserve the right to disagree, I will simply politely point out how the CR is wrong.
Q. How many CPPP's have been awarded so far?
A. One.
Q. I'm a celebrity (or a representative thereof). How do I get a CPPP for myself (or those whom I represent)?
A. Pray! Just kidding. Write your application down on a card and send it to us and we'll get back to you or something.
Q. Can you give us an example of what might invoke the CPPP?
A. Yes. Consider this snippet from a contribution by the CR, which appeared in a 1991 edition of The Nation in a special section called "What is Patriotism?" (link):
The acceptance of a common historical view may be considered the cornerstone of nationalism, yet when I consider the most broadly accepted view of history I realize that my America is quite different. In my America Columbus was not a benevolent explorer who happened upon an earthly paradise that yielded itself bloodlessly to his will. In my America the native peoples of this continent were not hostile savages, unprovoked to violence against the benign European colonialists. In my America the tobacco exports of the newborn Virginia settlement addicted a world to a powerful drug to secure a market and survival. In my America the capture, torture and enslavement of a race is unforgivable. In my America the blood and sweat of millions created an industrial power, and fortunes for relatively few.
I certainly disagree to a large extent. Few people think the conquest of the Americas was anything but a long series of wars, with - as in any other war ever fought - winners and losers. And, I will point out that those events happened many years ago and that in many ways the U.S. has been a rousing success and not just a beacon to the world but a constantly changing experiment. In general, I agree with Hank Hill. But, I digress.
Q. Who is the CR of the CPPP?
A.
When "kinda creepy" meets beautiful
It looks like this:
Why few take libertarianism seriously (11/23/07 4:24pm edition)
The 11/23/07 4:24pm (and 32 milliseconds) edition of our running feature "Why few take libertarianism seriously" features "Thanksgiving: The Producer's Holiday" from the Ayn Rand Institute (link). In case it disappears - as at least one article from that Institute has in the past - there's a cached copy here.
UPDATE: 11/23/07 4:24pm (and 73 milliseconds) edition of this feature is on display in the highly-similar "An Ayn Rand Thanksgiving - you've earned it!" And, it's even more libertarian than the other:
But, morally, we should reach for the sky. We should recognize that the corporate profits, electricity or pie was earned through our production - and savor its consumption. We should take pride in being rationally selfish - our lives and happiness depend on it.
Caption this George W. Bush picture (Part #931123)
Here, I'll start:
A Connecticut Doofus in Colonial Williamsburg
"What's a 'time machine', and why does this 'Dick Cheney' hate us so?"
"No, this isn't Paraguay."
(Picture from his Thanksgiving day address: link).
The bluebirds have yet not flown south for the winter due to the hot weather in Southern California
Just thought I'd pass on this observation: the bluebirds have yet not flown south for the winter due to the hot weather in Southern California. However, there appear to be fewer sparrows and pigeons around these days, perhaps simply because of the unseasonably warm weather. Yesterday it must have been 79 or 80, and the day before it was probably around 84. Unlike in New England, there are not only no leaves to turn, but the leaves wouldn't turn if they could. That said, at around the 5532' elevation level or so, there are indeed deciduous trees that can turn. You can see those by heading 25.3 or so miles up Highway 2. Best of luck!
AP: 'HuffPost "Worst Post" selection committee suffers group seizure'
This story just crossed the wires. Neurologists speculate it has something to do with all the possibilities simply "overloading their circuits" due to all the entries from Dave Johnson and many, many others, combined with this recent post being thrown on the pile:
Communist Party Pride! (TV ad)
You might be a Communist and not know it! We support things like a woman's right to vote, Social Security, and environmentalism. If you support those things too, you're a Communist and welcome to the Party. (We can worry about those other things we support later on).
Note: this isn't a take-off on the Center for American Progress "progressive" ads (like youtube.com/watch?v=qnktauTeIeg). It just looks a lot like it.
(While I prefer to let my art speak for itself and let others interpret it, I should point out that I'm not comparing "progressives" to Communists, only highlighting that CAP is being misleading about not disclosing everything that today's "progressives" represent.)
On puppets
I don't have much patience for novelty acts, and I have even less for the almost-completely-unknown-Canadian-cult-artist folk singer type, however, I do like the way she rolls the puppet here:
On the other hand, this video from about 18 years ago is the real deal:
Henry Rollins: how ashamed of himself should he feel?
Consider this clip from the aged punk's show before answering:
Is he putting some of the profits from the show aside in order to get her the treatment she obviously needs?
If his viewers get tired of JG, perhaps he could show bum fights or make fun of the retarded instead.
Hugh Hewitt is really, really, really happy about his cruise of South America
While smiles like this are usually associated with either maniacs or those who are about to embark on a BrazillianSexTour, I am almost positive that Hugh Hewitt was just having a good day. A really, really, really good day:
What does the Democratic Party stand for? (An Introduction)
Think you're a Republican? Think again! Dr. R. C. West of the DCNC has put together this instructional video to help show what the Democratic Party stands for and why you should join:
How many famous Democrats can you spot?
REGRETS, I'VE HAD A FEW UPDATE: While Democratic icon Gus Hall made the video - twice! - I unfortunately forgot to include pictures of Neville Chamberlain, Vidkun Quisling, and others. I also only had one piece of DailyKos content (the Joe Lieberman photoshop) and I didn't include their Ahmadinejad poll. Next time.
Students visit asylum, see Tony Villar, Dianne Feinstein
(From the L.A. Times, via this)
John Edwards in shocking torrid affair?
Our confidential sources are now ready to report: presidential contender John Edwards is involved in a steamy, shocking, torrid affair which started via phone calls and email messages and soon "exploded into romance":"The affair started about 18 months ago," a friend says the woman confessed to her. "When they met at a bar, sparks flew immediately.
"She never expected it would turn sexual since John is married and is running for President. But it soon did — and she fell for him."
In one bombshell e-mail message provided to The NATIONAL ENQUIRER, the woman confesses to a friend she's "in love with John," but it's "difficult because he is married and has kids."
In another e-mail, she writes: "Last night and this a.m., he actually has amazed me. He is a great man. My heart is loud and my head is silenced."
Liberal or Conservative? A primer with videos
Conservatives believe in authority, an almost mathematically-based order, efficiency, and reason:
On the other hand, liberals (called in more extreme cases "progressives" or "socialists") substitute reason for pure emotionalism. They enjoy dressing up as fairy tale characters and similar and engaging in historical re-creations; they believe in faerie sprites, hobgoblins, and elves. They also tend to have higher voices. And, they enjoy long walks through the woods engaging in interpretive dance:
Just show us your... Neglected Tropical Diseases
There are only a few things I associate with Huffington Post's newest blogger, and "neglected tropical diseases" is not one of them (link).
I learned about NTDs when I heard Dr. Peter Hotez speak at least year's Clinton Global Initiative and I felt compelled to help raise awareness of this injustice.
UPDATE: I note sadly that her headshot is just 45 by 45 pixels, while, as I pointed out before, a whopping 45 by 64 pixel picture was needed to contain the head of Bill Maher. Because we really want to get a close-up look at him.
Got a letter for Bob?
This [warning: NSFW] is pretty funny, and manages to be almost as creepy as the real Bob.
Harvest Hillary! And, Gravel looks for a rock
Tonight's Democratic debate was just a sham, so let's make with the funny or a close approximation thereto.
First, it's Harvest Hillary. Dressed in one of her autumnal pantsuits, the candidates prepares to make what is considered in some countries an obscene gesture:
Then, Mike Gravel look for either a rock to throw, or for his single supporter:
It's time to call out the enablers!
I want to assure everyone that this video is neither a troll nor a satire, and it's not sad at all that those leaving comments* can't figure that out:
* UPDATE: To make this perfectly clear, the reference is to the comments at Youtube, not those here. I would also like to clarify that the "ENABLER!" graphic - which I just copied and pasted into random places immediately before pressing 'Save' - may be a bit confusing. The appearance in the video of The Pope and The Natster are meant to be guiding lights on JFo's path to recovery and I am not in any way accusing them of being enablers.
Hillary Clinton: I'm not a lesbian *
Responding to the question "How do you respond to the occasional rumor that you're a lesbian?", Hillary Clinton says: "It's not true".
* Now, certainly, some reactionaries and other members of The Conspiracy might say something about the meaning of the word "is" in this case. But, it does apply, since "are" is a declension of "is", and the word "is" in this case is not entirely clear. Could it be referring to that instant moment at which the question was asked? Certainly, it wasn't referring to all time in the past, present (whatever moment the present might be; it constantly changes), or the future. When saying "it's not true", could Hillary be referring to the rumor itself, saying that she's never heard that rumor? Or, could she have been referring to the frequency of the rumor, saying that she thought it was heard more or less times than "occasional" would suggest? Could she have some lesbian "experiences" but not be a full-on lesbian? Could she have thought that she was responding to the question whether she was really from the Island of Lesbos?
Take the poll in the extended entry!
What would you like Sally Field to dress as?
You can only choose one, so make it count.
In defense of Katie Couric
Once every decade or so, this site seeks to be fair and balanced and defend Katie Couric from her critics, such as those who point out that her trip to Iraq generated record-tying low ratings.
~~~ BEGIN DEFENSE ~~~
I actually think she looks better with the more natural look and with her hair tied back.
~~~ END DEFENSE ~~~
Los Angeles Times cost-saving measures released
The Los Angeles Times has released several cost-saving measures they'll be undergoing to deal with declining circulation:
* Patt Morrisson will auction past hats off on eBay (wait, it gets better).
* Their "Reader's Rep" will be replaced with an email address that no one reads.
* Selected stories about celebrities will be outsourced to those celebrities' publicists.
* Something about wikis replacing their current blogs or something. Maybe Michael Kinsley has some ideas.
* The City Hall beat will be written by Tony Villar's office.
* All stories about protests will be outsourced to ANSWER.
* All stories about immigration will be outsourced to the Los Angeles Mexican consulate.
There, that ought to do it.
BOY AM I EMBARRASSED UPDATE: I just realized that the date on the LAT's press release announcing the changes was September 6, 1997, not 2007.
Sam Brownback addresses the multitudes in New Hampshire
Speaking yesterday at the New Hampshire Institute of Politics at Saint Anselm College in Manchester, NH, Senator Sam Brownback drew a crowd. The following picture explains why so many people were there:
Breaking: Watergate 2? Burglars break into politician's office
Breaking... In what may in fact turn out to be "Watergate 2", burglars have broken into a politician's office and have taken unspecified things, also leaving unspecified evidence behind... Developing... now trying to determine where, when, to whom...
This just in... dateline: Hartford Connecticut... politician is Senator and presidential candidate Christopher Dodd... never mind...
Nancy Pelosi is Teh Hottness
In case you're having trouble finding what exactly Drudge is refering to, I've enlarged and highlighted the affected area:
She can - she must - do better.
Welcome the latest member of Team Lonewacko!
In order to get into Google News, I'm converting this site into a group blog. Sure, some might have thought it was a group blog already, given that both Robert Hilburn and an apparent Clintonian agent have all posted here. But those were all just very clever fakes.
This time it's for real. Due to a recent downsizing at his company, next week we'll be bringing on board famed journalist and thought leader Ed Anger. Please welcome him to the team.
Dennis Kucinich hospitalized with "food poisoning"
At least, that's the official tale. We here suspect extreme exhaustion:
Of course, it might be something other than his wife. We could in fact be witnessing Hillary Clinton starting to bump off this round of her enemies.
Keeping the dream alive
There are some people who appear never to have complied with our wishes, but that doesn't keep people from wishing that they had. One of the latter persons recently visited this site via a search for:
I'm putting it in pictoral format to avoid other such searches, since I cannot comply with their request.
Perhaps that earnest searcher is, like me, a fan of the Star Trek episode "Faces" from Voyager [1], the one where B'Elanna Torres (played by Roxann Dawson, formerly with a "Biggs-" on her last name) turned completely human rather than half-Klingon. I really liked the vulnerable all-human version, especially the scene in the cave or whatever, and I was sad to see her have to have her ridges glued back on. My occasional searches for others sharing my same speciality interests reveals little; perhaps they're too busy arguing over Picard vs. Kirk.
Here's a screengrab from presumably the end of the episode which looks OK, and here's a publicity shot where she's looking really good. Here's a small picture of unknown setting. Nowadays, of course, you can find her hanging out with people who like to play dress up (link, link).
[1] en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Faces_%28Star_Trek:_Voyager%29
Eddie Murphy sighting
la.indymedia.org/news/2007/06/200054.php
I kid, I kid.
Diana Chi: have you no shame? (Some will dare call it treason)
MSNBC has recently released a list of some journalists who've made political contributions. Shockingly, 1 out of 9 of them have donated to Republicans or conservatives. Let's take a look at these people that I - at least - shall dare call traitors.
There are the expected reactionaries: Joe Scarborough, a couple Forbes editors, and a Bill O'Reilly producer.
However, there are some others we might not suspect, such as 19 year old Diana Chi, a so-called "news writer" at KTLA right here in Los Angeles. She's donated $8,025 to the Republican National Committee... since she was 14! Clearly, these must have been sham transactions. Either that, or she was brainwashed at an early age.
Perhaps even more shocking are the contributions from Rafael Roman, a Thirteen/WNET host ("New York Voices"). Instead of, for instance, donating to The Nation or ANSWER as you might expect from a PBS host in New York City, he gave $250 to Bush in 2004.
Moles don't just live in gardens, they live in the very heart of our most cherished edifices.
Moles also seek to subvert our cherished culture: Charles Perry, food writer for the Los Angeles Times, gave to the RNC. Washington Post film critic Stephen Hunter gave to the NRCC. Robin Gaby Fisher, feature writer for Newark's Star-Ledger, gave to both Bush and the RNC. Harry Broertjes, a "copy editor/page designer" for the Miami Herald is a serial offender, donating to both Bush and the RNC. Reactionaries to the south of me: San Diego Union-Tribune graphic artist Joe Cline gave to the RNC, as did Barbara Bradley, fashion editor of Memphis' Commercial Appeal. Even Beth Hudson, a self-descript "sports reporter" with Allentown's beloved Morning Call gave to the RNC.
There are other moles, covert agents, Fifth Columnists, and other traitors listed... but even more importantly there are many yet to be uncovered.
Your road map towards understanding "liberals"
I kid, I kid.
Epistle to The Nation, in re: Eric Alterman arrest
I have sent the following "bletter" to The Nation in regards to their article "Alterman's Arrest" about the momentary arrest of the famous Nation columnist who is also a paid Media Matters hack. Perhaps it will be printed:I'm sure I'm not the only one who's thinking this must have been a coordinated attack. What better way to draw attention away from the devastating points the Democratic contenders were making... other than to hijack the conversation by having a well-known and highly-respected journalist arrested! My beliefs are further strengthened by this appearing on the Drudge Report which, as everyone who's "in the know" knows, is controlled by the RNC Central Committee.
No, this was no random arrest. This was planned well beforehand, with the very strong possibility that Mr. Alterman was corralled into that room with the free drinks, perhaps through a series of room dividers and the like being placed surreptitiously in his way in order to force him to arrive where he did. Then, there's the matter of the "policeman". I put that in quote because I imagine he was something else entirely. Yes, quite something else.
Fly low, Brother Eric, avoid the radar, and keep on keepin' on!
Will Howard Kurtz be my friend?
Howard Kurtz of the WaPo has joined Facebook. Will he be my friend?
On my undisclosed Myspace page, I'm friends with Phil Angelides (remember him?), RawStory, and Hillary Clinton, so hopefully Howie will want to be my friend as well.
Natalie Merchant is not having a good day
Even transcendental demigoddesses like Natalie Merchant can have their off days, as this photo illustrates:
(It's not one of mine, I got it from here. I didn't get it from here.)
We're all birds today
"Am I a libertarian?" Take the fun online quiz!
Many people are concerned that they, or someone they know, might be a libertarian. While the MMPI (Minnesota Multiphasic Personality Inventory) can be used to uncover libertarianism and other sociopathies, it takes a long time and requires expert interpretation.
Enter the World's Smallest Political Quiz!
This is an updated version of the classic that you may have taken already, and it can be used to determine whether you suffer from libertarianism, objectivism, dynamism, or other related afflictions.
Hey, that's what I drink!
I have a confession to make. I drink a lot of Diet Shasta, frequently guzzling straight out of the 3 liter bottle. Now, you can almost see one kinda explode:
I've used the bottles for various purposes, such as carrying drinking water when hiking and backpacking, and also carrying several of them filled with non-potable water on training hikes; when I get to the top of something I empty out the water. I've dropped them on rocks and such, and I've only had one of them create a spill. That was in a 99 Cents Store parking lot, and, while I didn't write anything down, I seem to recall that that was a cap-related issue.
I think it would be possible to fashion a fairly cheap way to do this that would create a very large explosion; perhaps with a time-release setup of some kind (candy coated with something else) or something that would automatically release a large number of candies all at once in the bottom of the bottle rather than simply putting them in the top by hand.
John McCain: your lettuce picking trainee is ready
Our president loading lettuce onto a truck in Guatemala at a relief facility involving the US AID.
On the audio, he says loading the lettuce was one of the top moments of his presidency and it was, "really, really fun." I'm not making that up.
UPDATE: Read it and weep (whitehouse.gov/news/releases/2007/03/20070312-4.html):
The United States and Guatemala trade a lot, especially now that Guatemala has become a full member of CAFTA-DR. President Berger and I believe that CAFTA can spread opportunity, provide jobs, and help lift people out of poverty. We saw how trade can transform the small village of Chirijuy -- part of our experience in traveling with the President was to get outside the capital. It was really, really fun -- and really heartwarming. As a matter of fact, it was one of the great experiences of my presidency. The town has grown from subsistence farming to selling high-value crops, like lettuce and carrots and celery. As a matter of fact, I got to pack some lettuce. The President and I were hauling boxes of lettuce, we were putting them in the truck.
On the audio he can't pronounce "subsistence", and he sounds even more like a five-year-old than the text might lead you to think.
I capitulate on Global Warming, just make the video stop
Want to see an unintentionally funny video of Yale students rapping against Global Warming? Check out that video and many others here: truths.treehugger.com
I am willing to elect Al Gore a secular Pope if it will make stuff like this stop.
UPDATE: I submitted the direct link to the video (truths.treehugger.com/video/convenient_truths_climate_and.php) to both Digg and Reddit, and it went nowhere. Apparently I didn't sell the "unintentionally hilarious" aspect well enough. Or, maybe it's just me, but I think it's really, really funny.
Brandon Cropper reads from "The Fountainhead" by Ayn Rand (Part 1 of 3)
[This is court-mandated libertarian coverage.]
The first part (of three!) of Brandon Cropper reading from "The Fountainhead" by Ayn Rand is here. Enjoy!
Posted at 02:22 PM | Comments (0)
Actress threatens dogs; cats celebrate!
Br'er Drudge is linking to this article about an actress apparently going a bit overboard in an antithetical-to-PETA manner.
Perhaps Reuters should edit the teaser link they're showing next to the story:
Posted at 02:54 PM | Comments (1)